The Men In My Life Go on their 1st Father/Son Campout

So last year I was really hurt, because Jeremy didn't think Thomas was ready to go on a campout. He was 2 and a few months. I'm not sure what the typical age is for a son to go on father/son campouts, but I was afraid Jeremy didn't want to take him, because of his special needs. I was afraid he wouldn't take him if he didn't walk and do other things that a typical child does. The unstable mama emotions definitely come out when I think Thomas is missing out on anything because of his disabilities. I definitely overreact some times. It just makes me want to cry when I think about our little boy missing out on some of the greatest, most memorable life experiences. I'm worried that congnitively he understands and wonders why he is different. Why he can't get up and play like the other kids. Why can't I march around in a line like the other kids. Why can't I jump up and catch a bubble. Why can't I climb up the stairs and go down the slide. Why, Why, Why. I feel like he is a spiritual giant with the best ever attitude, so I'm sure it is just my feelings. He probably knows exactly why he is the way he is and has an understanding of it, accepts it, and is happy about it. What a special little man.

Well about two weeks before the campout Jeremy asked me if it was okay if he took Thomas. I was ecstatic! They had a blast together. Someone had to save Thomas from falling in the fire once when Jeremy was cooking breakfast, but other than that all incident free. (seriously) I am such a proud mama and wife to have had my two sweeties go on their first ever campout together. I love those two guys. Jeremy even took his feeding gear and hooked it to the top of the tent and got him fed through his G Tube all night. What a MAN!!!

Here are some pictures of the campout. Jeremy even remembered the camera which is better than I would have done. He constantly amazes me. Most of these pictures are of our loving bishop and his son Matthew with Thomas. Bishop McHugh always talks about how much he loves Thomas and how special he is. We are moving into another ward and I think most of our ward will miss Thomas the most. I don't know whether to feel happy or sad about that. I think happy.

10th Anniversary Only 4 months late

I've been wanting to blog about our 10th anniversary for awhile, but haven't made the time.

First let me just say that I love my husband. There are many things we do not agree on and we have at least a couple tiffs a week, but he is one of the best men I know. It must be hard to live with me and all my complaining, lack of good cooking, cluttered house, etc. It seems i'm always forgetting to do something. He is so patient and rarely complains. I'm so blessed to be loved for what I do right and not scrutinized for my failings. He is such a sensitive, loving, hard working, good looking, all around "good" man. I've been the luckiest or most blessed girl to get to have him for 10 years and counting.

He is such a wonderful father as well. It always makes me smile to watch him with Thomas. Thomas doesn't think there is anything better than when daddy gets home from work. it makes my day as well when Jeremy gets home. It was so adorable the other night. Thomas loves it when people kiss. He gets so excited and does his little yell/laugh whatever it is. We were doing a family group hug and Jeremy kissed me and then kissed Thomas and Thomas grabbed the back of both of our heads and made us kiss again and again laughing each time he did it. It was one of those "yeah life is good and it is all worth it just to have a few minutes of family love time".

Here are some of our pics from our Disneyland trip we took to celebrate our 10 years together. We spent 3 days at Disneyland and California Adventures. It was so much fun and really awesome to just spend time with the two of us. No obligations, no children, etc. Just fun. It was great, because we saved the money the year before and so we just took cash and there was no stress thinking about how we were going to pay our bills, because it was set aside just for our trip. I would recommend traveling that way all the time. We usually just do it and then regret it later. This was a no regret trip.

Thomas's Birthday Invitation Directions

Some of you have had troubles figuring out Thomas's invitation, so I thought I'd make it easier. First Click on the play button. Then click where it says click to start. Then you can play around with all the funny noses, glasses, hats, etc. by dragging them onto the photo with your mouse. When you are done playing click on the camera in the lower right hand corner and it will take you to the invitation details.

Love you all and sorry for any confusion.

Thomas Is Turning 3!

Make a Smilebox greeting

Nash Family Reunion July 2008

Nash Family Reunion July 2008

Well this has taken me forever to get to, but here are the pictures from the amazing Camp Lomia family reunion last summer.

Thanks to Aunt Susan we are financially able to have a huge family reunion every year. Aunt Peggy, Aunt Glenda, and Aunt Gayleen have been so fabulous at planning and organizing them. We are grateful to them for keeping it going.

This reunion was so fun. I loved it. What a great family i've been able to become a part of since marrying Jeremy 10 years ago. The more family the merrier I say.

Thomas's walking machine - Pony Gait Trainer

Well we are feeling mightily blessed this week. After about 11 months Thomas was finally approved for a gait trainer and it arrived yesterday. As you can see in the pictures it is bright yellow and black and has a horse picture on it. I think he looks so cute in it. So far he pushes it backwards, but eventually he'll get it to go forward I'm sure.

It has been really tough lately, because for a year he has been pulling himself into a standing position, but also falling for a year. He wants so badly to get around and get into things like other two year olds. He works so hard to do the things that seem to come so naturally for most of us. I hope his pony walker helps him go all the places he wants to go.

Slade Family Reunion - July 2008 - Gallup NM

Slade / Nash Family Reunions - July 2008

I love my family!!! I can't say that too many times. My grandparents, parents, siblings, and nieces and nephews are so amazing. It is hard to put into words the feelings I have for my famiy. The chaos is amazing. There were 24 people staying under one roof at my parents house. I LOVE CHAOS. Woo Hoo! The kids are all loud and excited and running every which way. My family is such a movie family, but what was kind of neat this time was when the kids went to bed instead of watching movies, two of the nights the adults just talked and laughed together. It was really neat to get closer to my siblings and their spouses that way. The other part that was so neat was one night my dad decided to teach all the grandkids how to play drums. They were so excited about that. He has been a drummer for a long time and that is how he got himself through college. It was really neat to see him pass it down to the grandkids. My favorite picture of Thomas was taken on grandpas lap learning how to play the drums.

The last night we were in New Mexico we got to witness Trent (Tracy and JJ's 2nd child) get baptised. He chose the speakers and the songs and it was a really spiritual night. We also had sadness that night because AshLeigh wasn't able to get baptised with him. (Wendy and Travis's 2nd child) She was a strong girl; though, and we were all very proud of her.

Let me just say one more time "I LOVE MY FAMILY".

The best part of this summer was definitely not the money in gas we speant to go to our two family reunions, but the reunions themselves.

Jeremy's family is great and it was fun getting to know them better at Camp Lomia in Utah. We camped for two nights. We had games and smores by the fire, got in water fights, damned up the river, visited, and tried to spot deer and other wild creatures. He has an awesome family and I feel blessed to be a part of it.

I am going to attach pictures as soon as I get them rounded up, but here are some of my families reunion. More to come...

Infertility

I hope Jeremy is okay with me writing about this. I feel it could help any men who may be experiencing some of the same feelings.

It has been 9 years and 3 months since we first started trying to conceive a baby and to this day we have not had that particular blessing given to us. Through all of this I have had some incredibly rough times dealing with the anger, heartbreak, sadness, helplessness, and feeling broken. Jeremy has always just been supportive. -I love you Becky no matter what. I'll be just fine if we adopt. I just want kids and lots of them -

Until this past week. He came home from work and cried telling me how badly he wants us to be able to have natural children. He loves Thomas so much, but he also wants to be a birth father. When he told me I felt relief that he finally understood how i'd been feeling for over 9 years. Let me just say I have been obsessed with pregnancy, child birth, and everything that goes along with it. Every time I hear a babys first cry tears come to my eyes and I feel as if my heart will break. (break with joy or sadness or both I don't know), but the miracle of life is so beautiful to me.

Later that same day my feelings changed from relief to feelings of depression. It felt wrong to be Jeremy's wife and to keep him from being able to experience that most beautiful experience of making a child. I felt as though I'd let him down. I felt very broken again. What if I am never able to get pregnant and he never gets to be a birth father.

I guess I need to just have faith that we will work through whatever comes our way. That he chose me as his wife and is still happy with that decision. That he doesn't regret marrying me. Faith that we can endure through and will be that much more blessed for it. And just maybe Heavenly Father will bless us like he did Abraham and Sara with a baby when we are old. If not well that is just part of life and life is short and I'm not going to let anything get in the way of our eternal progression.

Our Thomas and Loved Ones

A New Month

How short life seems sometimes. The days blur into weeks, months, and years. It always surprises me to realize how much time has passed...since I graduated high school, married Jeremy, met Thomas.

It's been 12 years since I graduated high school. Our 10 year anniversary is coming up this December and Jeremy and I are planning a trip to Disneyland and the surrounding fun. He has never been there and I figure at age 32 its definitely TIME. It is going to be a blast. He's is the funnest person i've ever known and everytime we get breaks from the everyday stresses I'm reminded of how much I really do LOVE his company. We've had Thomas for 2 years and five months now. He is an amazing little man. We wonder what we ever did before him. Life is so full.

Right now Jeremy and I are trying to figure out why our business is not being profitable. We've always struggled, but in the past we always had a huge amount of accounts receivables we were trying to collect, but right now the number is not that high and we are struggling worse than ever. We are having to lay off some of our employees which is heartbreaking for us. It feels like we have failed. We have such wonderful people working for us. It is hard to let them down.

Deep Thoughts - By Well Not Jack Handy, but Becky

I've been thinking lately about myself and life and what it all means. Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints of course I know the big picture of where I came from, why I'm here on earth, and where my goal is to be after this life. Sometimes the deeper meaning of "why am I here?" is what really gets me going. Of course we are here to prove ourselves to our Heavenly Father and to return to Him when we die, but I believe that each of us has a profound difference that we can make while we are here and what that profound difference is, is the question.

I was recently watching the Youtube video of Paul Potts singing for Britains Got Talent. Everytime I hear his first audition I cry. Today I was trying to figure out what makes me cry when I hear him sing that song. I've decided it is because he is making his difference in the world. He shows us what we all can become when he sings. We all want greatness and to make a difference and when we see an unknown person, doing a normal everyday job, suddenly become something great that brings light into everyones life we re-remember that their are great things for each of us to do and we just have to keep searching and reaching until we find what those things are that will make our life truly meaningful.

My Family - Oh how I love them Slide Show

Christmas 2007

Oh the fun of Christmas! One of the coolest things is just hanging out together in our pajamas, enjoying each others company, and not having anywhere to rush off to.

I'm getting Grandpa with the roll of wrapping paper! He's all mine!

I'm not sure who is keeping who from opening presents here or who is winning, but it looks like they are both smitten with each other.

We Love Grandpa!





Yes, these are my gifts. No, I am not spoiled. (at least not by my mom and dad. We won't mention whether or not Grandpa and Grandma spoil me)





















It is a Slade Christmas, so of course there is mucho singing time. That is what I love about home.

Aren't Dev and Karessa cute on their first Christmas as a married couple. :O)








Grandpa reading "Twas the night before Christmas" and Thomas loving it.

"This is like the BEST story EVER!!!"

I'm not sure if Grandma Judy or Thomas is enjoying this story more.

Isn't Grandma cute when she laughs! :O)

Our Forever Family

On November 23rd at 5:15 PM we were sealed to Thomas for eternity in the Mesa Arizona temple. It was amazing. It was stressful getting ready, because I am an unorganized person and didn't plan very well. I even left my temple recommend at home and someone had to go back and get it. When we were sitting there listening to the sealer the stress disappeared and I felt a wonderful feeling of peace and happiness.

Our Forever Family

Wow! Thomas's adoption was finalized Friday October 19th at 8:30 am. What a glorious day. He is now officially our son. We will be sealed as a family on November 23rd 2007 @ 5:15 pm.

Thomas's 1st Birthday

I can't believe it has been a year. What a fabulous year!

What a fun day! Thomas really really enjoyed his cake. The pinata was more for my benefit I think.

Summer 2006 Videos of Thomas

Daddy Blowing Toots on Thomas's Tummy!

Thomas in his bouncer/walker for the first time!